Sunday, August 07, 2011

Solar Flares Killed My Cell Phone Battery

My beloved dinosaur of a cell phone has died.
My husband thinks he can fix it although I think he is to blame considering he can't stand my trusty Blackberry Flip Phone.  If my husband continues to deny the allegations, the only other probability to my BB's destruction is  - the solar flares.

My BB is one of those things that I will hang onto for as long as I can.
Kind of like my paper calendars and paper bound books.

For any of you who are trying to reach me via cellular telephone or text, you are out of luck for an unknown period of time.

If you were calling for medical advice, please redirect your call to your personal physician.
If this is a medical emergency, please call 911 or go directly to the emergency department of the  hospital nearest you.

If you were calling to schedule a television interview, magazine interview, request my personal appearance or 10,000 copies of my autograph, my publicist will get back with you within the next 24 hours.

If this is not a medical emergency or a request for an interview, but it is an urgent matter, I can still be reached via email, my land line telephone at my place of residence (when the ringer is on and I am home to answer it - so good luck with that) or by carrier pigeon.

For all other matters requiring my services, my secretary will get back with you at his earliest convenience - which according to my paper desk calendar will be on or after August 22, 2011.

Thank you and have a good evening.


Anonymous said...

Maybe you'll find that cellphone you bought for Julien and all your problems will be solved! OK, maybe not ALL of them...