Tuesday, January 12, 2010

I can rest assured

(No, I did not ask permission from my sister to write this post. Part of me is furious, the other is devastated. Nobody can change the past, but we can learn from it.)
I can rest assured, that my sisters face will never be forgotten and that the sound of her sobs will never be wiped from the memory of an OB who made the biggest mistake of his life.
I can only hope that the biggest mistake of his life will save countless lives in the future.
Christmas Day my sister called the OB on call because she was so sick and knew something wasn't right. This OB asked my sister a question he is guaranteed never to ask another patient:

"What exactly do you expect to change between now and Tuesday (the next OB visit)?"

I can only assume that he was eager to get back to his Christmas dinner and thought my sister was being a whiny, pregnant woman with nausea.
He got his answer a day later as he cut into my sisters womb.

Today he told my sister that he "had missed it" and that although he would never understand her pain, that she should be grateful to be alive to take care of her daughter because he didn't think she would be. This same doctor called up to ICU after he went home that night to check to see what my sisters condition was...because the (pregnancy induced) diagnosis that he told her today...if left untreated, was fatal.
It was left untreated and would have taken my sisters life along with that of my nephews if my sister hadn't been adamant about letting this doctor know that she really was so very, very sick.
This same doctor told my sister that she did exactly what he told her to do and that she had absolutely no fault in what happened.

We already knew that.
So, as he lays down to sleep tonight, I truly pray that our God watches over this man and takes the mistake that took two lives - almost three - and turns it into an opportunity to find the compassion that he probably had the day he graduated med school and help this man to save lives in the future of babies and mothers that trust him to care for them.
We have the answers we needed and it doesn't make it any easier.

It only makes the "what ifs" that much more troubling.

4 comments:

Aunt Nonna (Rhonda) said...

Thank you Jenn!

When I got off the phone with Mom after checking to see how Cecilia's appointment went, I just sobbed. I couldn't tell you if it was from anger, disgust or one of the many other emotions we're having.

As you said previously; life goes on, but how? When we're all hurting so badly!

Anonymous said...

Jennifer,
I barely know you and have never met your family (other than Chris and the kids) and I am outraged at your sister's OB. I find myself so angry right now. Yes, it was a holiday and yes, he wanted to be at home with his family but because of how is reacted (or lack thereof), another family is in complete and utter heartbreak. I pray that I may find that my anger dissipates some and I continually pray for your family.

Cecilia said...

Thank you Jennifer; I still fight with myself wondering what I could have or should have done differently. Nothing will bring my babies back. Gabi kissed their picture last night at bedtime and it broke my heart some more. She missed out on being a great sister and I missed out on getting the chance to be a great mother to those sweet little boys. We all have experienced a terrible loss and I can't find the words to talk about it to anyone. Maybe in time but not now. Thank you for saying the things that I can't.

Love always!

Ashley said...

I am so sorry that yall had to go through this, I have cried my eyes out reading these posts and your sisters comments. I will continue to pray for healing and comfort for your family. Thank you for allowing us to know about this difficult time in yalls life and for allowing us to be here and support yall with prayer.