Saturday, October 03, 2009

My Ballerina - Two-years later

I have made a very concerted effort to put a good majority of my worries at bay, primarily because I have discovered that things have a way of working out.
Maybe not always perfectly, but at the very least - to my satisfaction.
There are conversations that I forget an hour after I have had them, there are conversations that I can vaguely recollect and then there are the conversations that will forever be clear in my mind.

A conversation in which I held my three-day-old baby and told a physician that I would be okay if my baby were never able to do the things in life that her peers were doing.
It would be okay if she never were to become a ballerina or a soccer player, that I would make sure there were other opportunities for her in life.
I remember that.
I remember that I said it very matter-of-factly and I knew the day would come in which I would sit back and see those words come to fruition.
Today was that day.
Chris and I were so proud.
We were so proud while we were sitting in a room full of parents watching their perfectly balanced children - dance


and we were holding back the tears as those same perfectly balanced children helped my baby without anyone asking them to


and we held back the tears even more as the teacher held our baby's hand to help her transition from one activity to the next


and we held back the tears as we watched our baby stand in the middle of the class as the other children danced around her because she was not able to keep up


and we held back the tears as we saw the beautiful smile on her face


and I held back the tears when two parents told me after class that my baby did such a good job.
I am one very determined Mommy and will allow nothing to stand in the way of providing my children with everything in life that they deserve
and my baby girl
deserves the opportunity to stand, sit, crawl or walk in the same studio as every other child and dance and enjoy the sound of the music and to be loved...
and to be loved more than anyone could imagine.


Waiting patiently for class to begin.
The camera bag is almost bigger than her!Waiting patiently for her turn to go into the studio for the first time!
Checking out her beautiful outfit!

It all began last weekend, when my dear friend Patti said, "you should sign her up for dance". "Dance?". "You know of a dance studio for special needs children", I asked.

Children's Dance Foundation is the most fabulous place I think I have ever laid eyes on.

This opportunity just fell right in my lap. I looked on their website last week only to see that they do not offer special needs classes until a child is "school age" and the only "typical" classes are through the week during the day (err!). So, I picked up the phone to find out if by chance there were any other options and the lady on the other end of the phone preceded to tell me that there was ONE class on Saturday that just so happened to have ONE opening...and we could have it if we wanted it.

This same lady told me that we never would know how Addie would do if we didn't sign her up and let her try and this same lady told me that they would be happy to help Addie in any way that they could...they would help her and the same lady listened to my only concern...the other parents. Would the other parents feel that Addie was inconveniencing their child, holding their child back, disrupting the class? The same lady told me that you never know how the other parents will respond, but that it was worth pursuing...

and so we did.

Addie cannot run.

Addie cannot jump.

Addie cannot understand some of the simple directions given to her

and

Addie cannot lift her legs and wiggle her toes

but

Addie can "dance" to the music

and

Addie can find more joy in the simple act of being in a studio with other children

and

Addie can bring joy to other people.

We had nothing to lose.

7 comments:

Nicole said...

BEAUTIFUL! That post gave me chills and brought tears to my eyes!

Jennifer said...

wow jenn, beautiful post. really touches my heart.

Kim said...

Yes...beautiful post! And an even more beautiful little dancer!!

jennohara said...

I've always told myself that Hanna will do the same things that Gracie will do. I will put her into the same dance class, or same gymnastics class, etc. Your post really inspired me. It was like the whole experience for you was meant to be. Everything fell right into place! I'm so happy that Addie is exceeding ALL expectations for her. Jenn, you have been Addie's strength and YOU are what is helping her to become the wonderful, amazing, little miracle she is growing up to be!

Jenn said...

WOW! That is so AWESOME. Can't wait to see some clips of her dancing.

csmith said...

Jenn,
If God ever made an angel here on earth for all to see, it is Addie! She is such a beautiful and wonderful blessing to all who come into contact with her! You have such a beautiful family and God has truly blessed you! Love, Carie

Katie said...

WE MISS YOU ADDIE!! I am so happy to read your update and see her looking gorgeous in her little tutu. So proud of you girlie!