Thursday, May 06, 2010

Barnes and Noble

Did you guys know that Barnes and Noble implants an invisible chip into the brains of blond haired/blue eyed little girls named Chunky Monkey as soon as they enter into the children's section of their store?
Well...they do.
These chips force the children to cause an atrocious ruckus, scream, cry, throw books and have all out tantrums followed by a wailing that continues to the front check-out.
As these children exit through the main doors of Barnes and Noble, the chips are invisibly sucked from the brains of the children and they resume normal behavior.
They allow their Mothers to strap them into their car seats without incident, they begin to look at their new books and they even smile.
I have concluded that although their Mothers and fellow shoppers are permanently scarred for life, there are no lasting effects on the Chunky Monkey's.