Monday, December 28, 2009


Before I even begin, it is important to know that my sister gave her blessing for me to share some information.
Today has been hard.
My sister - Cecilia - is still in ICU tonight.
She was given two pints of blood this afternoon and although some levels have improved, others have not.
I will have to contact the funeral home in the morning to let them know that we will have to postpone the funeral until next week.
The doctor said that my sister will be in the hospital until at least this weekend.
I know so many of you have asked for details and for the vast majority, I feel it is out of concern and with offers of prayer.
To be honest with you, we do not know exactly what happened.
We know that my nephews - Ethan Reed and Evan Ryan - were perfectly healthy last Wednesday as they showed off their strong heartbeats during testing.
They were big and healthy, weighing in at 5 pounds 13 ounces and 5 pounds 9 ounces respectively.
We know the babies were active and doing well and then we know that my sister began exhibiting signs of what we thought was typical pregnancy sickness.
She was assured by her doctor and the on call doctor that she needed to take Zofran and push fluids.
We know that the babies were fine during our Christmas party and we know that by the time the doctor finally told my sister to go to the hospital Saturday, the babies heartbeats were gone.
That is all we know besides the fact that my sister did everything she was instructed to do by her Obstetrician and the on-call Obstetrician.
That is all we know other than my sister is now recovering in ICU and my nephews are now beautiful angels.
I do know that we may never have the answers we search for.
I do know that I thank God for allowing me to be a part of this time in my sisters life.
I was there with her as my niece came into this world and I was there with her as my nephews came into this world.
I needed to be there for my sister and I needed to be there to see the babies as they were born. I wanted to see for myself their condition as they were born.
We were blessed to have an anesthesiologist that was truly heaven sent.
I told him when I entered the O.R. that I wanted to watch the delivery and wanted him to let me know when the time was near and so he did.
He gently placed his hand on my shoulder, making eye contact with me and I stood moments before Ethan was born. He was beautiful. Perfectly beautiful with a head full of dark hair. Evan was born one minute later, a perfect match to his sweet brother. I looked for any signs of detectable complications or abnormalities.
There were none.
Only perfectly beautiful babies.
I watched them as the nurse tended to each one of them, stroking their heads and gently bathing each one.
I waited until the nurse had completed her job before I walked over to my sweet nephews.
They were cuddled together and I put my hand on their sweet bodies and told them how much they are loved. I told them how thankful we were to have them and the peace that we felt knowing that they were resting in God's arms.
I prayed to God to bless them and I prayed to God for peace for my sister.
I knew from the tone in the O.R. that my sister was much sicker than anyone had realized and as she was taken directly to ICU, our family gathered for our time to hold the babies and to love them.
At that moment, that was the most important thing for them to know - how very much they are loved.
We can't make sense of the situation and I realize it is not for us to understand, only to learn to accept.
Our acceptance is overridden by our earthly pain and your prayers are coveted.


Kim said...

Thank you so much for sharing...we are continuing to lift your family in prayer through this tough time.

Edwards said...

My Condolences to you and your family.

Jennifer said...

Jenn,I am speechless. I can't even imagine what you and your family have been going through. My heart and prayers are with you all this week.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for sharing this as I know putting this into words was difficult; however, through this pain, may people find the comfort of our Jesus in these trying times. What a wonderful sister and aunt you are.
Mercy Me " Bring the Rain"
"For I know there'll be days when this life brings me pain, but if that's what it takes to praise You, Jesus bring the rain".

Jenn said...

We will continue to pray for your family. Cecilia is blessed to have such a strong family support system.

Vicky Champion said...

Jennifer thanks for sharing and We are still praying for comfort and peace. As you spoke answers may never come but we have to trust God. Also what you did by being there for your sister and showing the affection and love to the boys was a genuine example of a sister and aunt relationship. That was SUPER and a God thing. Will keep you and your family in our prayers for the days to come...

Stephanie said...

I am so sorry for your family's loss. Thank you for sharing this with us. I will be praying for you all.

csmith said...

I am praying for you and your family. Love, Carie

Ashley said...

Thank you for sharing, I am sorry for yalls loss. Your family will be in our prayers.

Lori said...

from someone who has experienced the same loss..may god bless and keep your family in his arms. I had a full placental abruption at 37 weeks and now have a beautiful daughter in heaven. My prayers are for a easy recovery, comfort and peace.

Scott, Michelle and Edie said...

Our love and prayers for your sister and your family during this time. We will be lifting you up.

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry for your families loss. I pray your sister will first recover and then find some peace and comfort as she tries deal with such a tragic loss.

The Hall's said...


Anonymous said...

I am praying for your family. I can not imagine how hard this is. I pray that God will comfort all of you.

Leslie Bartlett

Lennie said...

I am praying for your and your precious family. I came across your blog about 2 years ago (link of a link of a friend's blog) and by reading your story these past 2 years I feel like I know you all.

I don't know if you are familiar with this website, but I have shared it with others who have been in similar situations:

Eve said...

Please know that you and your family have been and will continue to be in our thoughts and prayers.